The wonderful thing about attending knowledge gatherings is one can always count on each other to share the lessons learned. For this particular event, alhamdulillah, an old friend of mine had shared the following lessons:
GEMS from Shaykhaa Wafaa Hussain Yee
- Why is it more difficult to maintain your marriage with your husband than friendship with your sisters? Because shaytan always work on breaking a marriage.
- The nucleus family consists of the husband, wife and children. The nucleus family is the root of the society.
- When the root is problematic, then the tree (society) will be sick. So shaytan always work on destroying the roots.
- From the hadeeth, when shaytan reports to their leader that they made people kill each other, the leader said: "You did nothing". But when one shaytan said that it had caused a man and a woman to divorce, then the leader said: "This is shaytan's biggest success".
- If you behave like a queen to your husband, then your husband will behave like a king to you and your marriage will be difficult. Behave like a slave and he will also behave like a slave.
- In the end, men look at your heart rather than your looks.
- Men should not seek for a beautiful wife, rather seek beauty in your wife.
- Know the rights of your spouse before yours.
- The more you have expectations in your spouse, the more you will be disappointed.
- Say alhamdulillah even if things are hard.
- "Please", "sorry", "thank you" - always say these three phrases. Don't be arrogant: Not saying "thank you" because you think it is your spouse's responsibility to do things for you.
- Your dua is never unheard.
- End the circle of hate. Start goodness.
- Relationships are tested at the time of hardships.
- Listen attentively to your spouse, give them your time.
- Treat others the way you want to be treated.
- Don't be the typical woman, be a muslim woman.
- The tongue can be a very destructive weapon so much that it can destroy life.
- When you do a lot, but also complain a lot, then you will still be disliked. Grannies who don't do much but are always nice and say good things will be loved. So watch your words.
- When we get angry, our mind will blackout, so it is best to stay silent. Even if we want to say something good, the tone will be bad. So only speak after we have calmed down.
- Words that come from our mouth will go into someone's heart
- If you are bad at expressing your feelings by talking, then write a letter. You need to explain your feelings to your husband because men don't understand it.
- If your husband fears Allah SWT, then you have nothing to fear. You will trust him.
- As how you don't want to be compared, don't compare your man to others.
- Constantly check your intention. Purify it.
May Allah SWT keep us sincere in our intentions and may He make it easy for all of us to implement the knowledge shared, in our daily lives, Allahumma ameen.
12.31noon, Malaysian Time