.: Journey of faith :.

Hajj confession.

To be honest, I believe we were brought back, or given a second chance purely by the mercy of Allah. We were born in Islam, yet we didn't have Islam. We have the knowledge, we have the practical, but we do not have the spiritual awakening, we do not have wisdom, we do not have the understanding. That is what most born Muslims face. Faith cannot be inherited. It must be cultivated.

Has there ever been a day where the mist disappears even for a split second? Swathed by the wretched pitch darkness of the past, one eventually finds the pleasant momentary bliss that felt as though it could last for all eternity. Thus the once lost traveler embarks on a journey of struggles, to continue living, and holding firmly onto His rope with each passing breath, hoping that He will keep her steadfast in the deen till her very last breath. During times like these, it is so much easier to let the tears fall from the sky, and to be entirely engulfed by it.

Faith cultivation is a lifelong process.

2.52pm Malaysian Time

.: Corn muffins :.

'tis the season to be jolly.

In conjunction with the X'mas season, Kenny Roger's is running the "Making Wishes Come True" programme, where they have these little cards with a child's' name together with his/her wish hung on a X'mas tree.

Running something similar next year insha'Allah.

12.13 noon Malaysian Time

.: Weightless passage :.

I was in Singapore.

As I haven't gone through the checkpoint in years, I had forgotten this tiny fact that I can no longer breeze through Singapore customs. So there I was, waiting and texting friends telling them I will be fashionably late due to the fantastic morning crawl. I suppose that was what my classmates had to endure 17 years ago when we crossed national borders in the early mornings for school. With a map (in the bag) and my mum's ezlink pass, just as I was about to get on the bus heading Kranji MRT, mum, gave a call;

"Are you in Singapore yet? Call us if there is anything! Call us!!!"

Mum did the exact thing when I was in China.

"Are you in China yet? Call us if there is anything! Call us!!!"

That wasn't the only thing. I spent a huge bulk of my time going places with friends in China, and mum knowing this, specifically said;

"Stick with your friends. Don't stray away!"

True enough, mum said the same thing too while I was in Singapore. After all those years, I figured it was quite cute of mum to worry about me even though I am certainly no longer that little girl who was once upon a time petrified of her own shadow. So I tried to console mum over the phone, as how I often did whenever mum starts questioning who I'm with and where I'm at. And mum, being mum, probed further when it came to the juicy bits (under her definition).

"Who's the guy? Do I know him? What is his number? Are you sure he is a good person? Is he there? Can I speak to him? Do you need your father to speak to him?"

Mum, and her cute antics.

2.40pm Malaysian Time

.: Faded darkness :.

The food cart.

Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a harder battle.

Plato

Whenever she sees me loitering around the vicinity, she will call out to me to come over. Once she is done with attending to her customers, she will then kindly ask me about my well being. Sometimes she gives me food, sometimes she gives me money. She never lets me leave with nothing in hand.

All along I thought that I have nowhere to go to, that I have no one, that I have nothing and I am nothing. Her gesture made me feel that I can do something, that I should do something, and that I can be something.

-----

Two weeks passed since then.

2.04am Malaysian Time