Thursday, March 18, 2010

.: Ounces of life :.

Ties that bind.

I’ve been pondering about people and the lives that they lead. Then I began reflecting on the life I’m having, and Alhamdulillah I can openly admit that I am blessed. The family that I’m brought up in is able to provide the comforts of life and there hasn’t been a time when I had to endure a kind of hardship which is literally unbearable. The closest idea I have on what hardship means is based on the stories told by my parents and friends.

For the past few years I have started to learn to be more responsible in relation to myself and the family. However it is great to know that I will always have my family’s backing and support whenever, and wherever the need arises. Hence I supposed I had been living in a life where complacency and contentment exists as a pair.

On the other hand, conversations with friends and new acquaintances introduced me to another kind of life. Some voiced their concerns of striving tirelessly to make ends meet, while some are only seeing bleak futures. One of the appalling truths was when a friend fesses up some problems due to improper financial management. Thankfully the damage wasn’t so severe.

Just the other day I read about a person seeking forgiveness from his parents because he has been lying about his income. He doesn’t earn a lot, yet circumstances didn’t allow him to tell the truth. He doesn’t want to disappoint his parents neither does he want them to worry about him. He reached a deadlock when he felt he was unable to continue living in a life full of deceits, particularly to his parents.

In our culture as I supposed this happens in other cultures too we are expected to give our parents money once we are in the workforce, but my parents never raise this issue. Whatever I give, whether it is in monetary or material-form is solely based on my own discretion. They don't set any rules that I need to abide to. Then again, some parents expect certain obligations from their children, and this happens to be one of it. So I have friends lamenting that the amount they give is never enough.

This got me thinking again, just what is filial piety and does our definition of it ascertain the kind of life we lead? Are we truly being honest to ourselves and our parents when we  try to assume the role of a filial son/daughter? Or are we doing it because society and surroundings compel us to do so?

Just a thought.
10.43am Malaysian Time


The Sole Sisters Collective said...

Dear sis, I think that we can't really be true to ourselves and out parents or family by assuming a particular role.

On the other hand, life throws us curves, and trauma and drama in familial relationships can over-ride the basic role that we play.

Also, society is a huge factor because we are known for our deeds and how we treat our family members can be used to judge our character.

I am sure that people from various corners of the earth will give different answers as well.

Just my two-cents.

Hajar Alwi said...

Sister Salma: Welcome back. :)

Point taken. I've been getting various opinions on this and, there is no definite way of answering it.

It's just one of my attempts to see things in a simpler way.

Ms.Unique said...

Yup, this happens in our culture too.

Masha Allah U r blessed with a good, supporting family, Hajar. :)

Hajar Alwi said...

Alhamdulillah sis. Alhamdulillah. :)